Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
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