I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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