If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Randomize
