You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize
