Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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