margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
Randomize