I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
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