I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I just referred to our excessive fireball consumption as a team building exercise and everyone in group text agreed.
We're not alcoholics, we're a god damn team.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Randomize
