great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
Randomize
