she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
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