People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
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