Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
Someone signed my nipple.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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