Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
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