my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
you made out with another girl for some wings
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
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