So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
