Only a mothe r could love this liver
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
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