Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Did you pee in the oven last night??
Randomize
