He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
