I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
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