She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
All the doctor said was why
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
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