i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
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