they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Randomize
