what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
Randomize
