Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
do herpes really smell.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
Randomize
