I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
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