And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
