my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize
