Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
Farmville is her only friend.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
