It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Randomize
