can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Randomize
