careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
I can't turn off my feet"
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize