is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
She just used a chaser for red wine.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
Randomize
