I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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