I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
Randomize
