Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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