she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
Randomize
