Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Randomize
