you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
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