You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
Randomize
