So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
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