I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Duck Duck Cougar?
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Randomize
