Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
