just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
Randomize
