Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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