stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Randomize
