My hand turned me down
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
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