I feel great
I just peed on a car
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize