so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Randomize
