Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
He felt like a one man threesome
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Randomize
