I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
